I’ve been invited to a “Holiday Open House” on Sunday afternoon.  In the never-ending Jeep swerve which is my current life, I will find myself on the road south to a lovely zip code somewhere near Boston.  The conversation will be sparkling, the food will be plentiful, and festive cocktails will be flowing freely.  I won’t have much time to chat with the host and hostess because they’ll be busy having necessary conversations with all sixty or so of their guests.  It’s simple open house math:  two minutes of chat per guest.

Regardless of the amount of chat, a giftie must be given!

I pulled out one of my Emily Post books and researched this topic.  Fortunately, Ms. Post’s descendants have digitized her wisdom; here’s a brief overview which answers the question of “Should I bring a Hostess Gift?”

I have my own short list of rules for Hostess Giftie Giving.  I hope I don’t sound like a snob or a jerk, but I like to be practical, so:

1. The giftie must be locally sourced
2. The giftie must be something the host or hostess will enjoy and use
3. The giftie must not end up in a landfill.

Now that I have ruled out almost everything on the planet, here are a few of the items I am contemplating:

1.  A basket of apples from Hackleboro Orchards in Canterbury, NH.  I hope to see these farmers at the Seacoast Eat Local’s Winter Market on Saturday, December 8, 2012
2. A container of New Hampshire maple syrup, preferably in glass
3. Some local eggs arranged in a basket of greens from The Farm

There are also some local chocolate options, although chocolate is not truly “local” because it comes from the seed of the very tropical cacao tree.  This means the beans must travel here from faraway places like West Africa and South America.

Here’s a little hostess giftie someone left on the road to The Farm:

This particular giftie is quite mysterious, since I don’t recollect sending out invitations to a party.  I’d better check with the neighbors.

When it comes to giving hostess gifties, I guess I’m just a practical jerk; maybe I should consider giving a box of Hostess Twinkies?