The Memorial Day Blues

Posted on May 24, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

The weather forecast is sketchy here in New England this weekend and some of my Facebook friends are not happy.

“The weather forecast is depressing.”

“I’m seriously struggling with wardrobe decisions for Saturday and Sunday.”

Sigh…

I have mixed emotions about Memorial Day.  It’s a day to remember those who have died in military service.  What does it mean to remember?  Are clear skies and appropriate footwear necessary to salute the dead?

What of war?

Last night, I saw one of my favorite gardeners at the annual meeting of the Hampton Victory Garden.  We were brainstorming different ideas and suggestions.  A newer gardener said “Why don’t we get some chickens?”

My favorite gardener perked up.  He outlined the pros and cons of having a few chickens in the garden.  Someone said “Wow, Dick, you know a lot about chickens.”

Dick said “I used to be a chicken farmer.”

He then told us a story he had told me when I first met him.

In 1950, my favorite gardener had about 2,000 chickens.  He was looking forward to the peaceful life of a chicken farmer until the day he got a letter from the 33rd President of the United States, Harry Truman.  My favorite gardener was drafted into military service and requested to pack his bags and go to Korea.  He had to sell his chickens and his chicken farm to go to war.  When he got back, he did other things with his life, but the particular passion with which he told this story made me sad.  I think it made him sad, too, among other emotions.

Over the last ten Memorial Days, I’ve thought about war.  I think about war every day and even though I know that there is no cure for death, a world with fewer military deaths to remember would be a better world.

We might just have a few more chicken farmers, too.

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Uncle Bob Says

Posted on May 23, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

Uncle Bob says if we don’t have it in the barn or the shed, we probably don’t need it.

The things we needUncle Bob is usually right.

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I Almost Ran Out of Gas

Posted on May 22, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

It’s 6:01 a.m. and I’ve overslept.  It’s been that kind of week, running from one place to another.  Work obligations, tomato obligations, Hampton Victory Garden obligations, Moxie obligations, blogging obligations, birthday obligations, family obligations, and friendship obligations have filled my life.  I’m unglued and disorganized.

I almost ran out of gas.

That’s not like me.

Given that it’s Wednesday, it’s “Tiny Steps Gardening Day” and commenter Loosehead Prop will want to tell us about his Monticello-like experiments in the garden.  I couldn’t let the blog go dark today.  In spite of the impossible arrangement of hours and minutes, beautiful things are still happening every day.  Here are three:

  1. I planted 13 tomato plants at Uncle Bob’s on Saturday.  Sure, I’m putting them in a slightly different formation than last year and Uncle Bob gave me the same look he always does when I tell him I’m conducting an experiment.  He told me he’d cover them with plastic if there was any chance of falling temperatures and I was relieved.  This gardening by proxy is tough stuff.
  2. My mother’s CSA started last week.
  3. My neighbor, Jan, left me some homemade Won-Ton soup last night.

As they say on Tee Vee, “it’s all good.”

Take it away, Loosehead…you know you want to.

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The Rock Show

Posted on May 21, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

The other night I was talking to my friend Jaxon on the phone.  I never see Jaxon anymore because even though he only lives twenty miles away, he works all the time.  He works for one of the world’s most valuable companies, making things right for their customers.

Jaxon is a real gentleman and he’s very funny.  He’s a bit of a writer in his own regard and if he had more time, I think he’d be a great blogger.  I’d like him to call his blog “Jaxon the Gentleman” and he could provide people with helpful ideas about navigating the post-modern world with style and grace.  Wondering how much to tip the car detailer?  Ask Jaxon the Gentleman.  Wondering if those ratty-BLEEP chinos are the best thing to wear on “casual Fridays” at the office?  Ask Jaxon the Gentleman.  Wondering where to find the best live music this summer in New England?  Repeat after me: ask Jaxon the Gentleman.

Jaxon and I have been to a few concerts in the time we’ve known each other and as we chatted about the list of performances scheduled at The Hampton Beach Casino Ballroom, we gave serious consideration to attending Billy Idol’s concert on June 2, 2013.

“Wouldn’t it be fun to see a concert again, just like the old days?” Jaxon asked.

One summer night in 1999, Jaxon and I went to see Howard Jones at the Now Long Defunct Insert Bank Name Here Pavilion in Boston.  Jaxon had a red Mazda Protégé and the peppy car was well-maintained and only a little weary from hauling Jaxon around and around Boston on Route 128.  I can still remember him zipping in and out of traffic on Route 93 as we blasted into the city that summer night, with steamy hot air coming into the car in chunks.  There were three bands playing at the Pavilion, but I don’t remember who the first two were.  We got to the concert and milled around for a few hours and then someone spilled a beer on Jaxon.  He’s a gentleman, but the heat and the smelly beer on his neatly pressed pants was the beginning of the end of our good time.  Howard Jones came on stage and opened up with “Things Can Only Get Better.”  It should have been the turnaround moment for Jaxon but, unfortunately, a very large dancing woman stepped on Jaxon’s toe.  In a moment of lost composure, he shoved her.  It was tense for a few seconds and then we moved to a different section of the Pavilion.  The evening ruined, we left early and headed out across the city into the deep night air.

Remember, Jaxon?

Last night I walked down to the Casino Ballroom area to inspect the concert venue.  I headed out onto Ocean Boulevard into the night air, chunky with fog and humidity just like it had been the night of the Howard Jones concert.

When I got to The Casino Ballroom’s back parking lot, I noticed the addition of a row of garbage cans dividing the area.  In spite of this volume of trash receptacles, there was garbage strewn around everywhere.  Beer cans, hamburger wrappers, and a lone flip-flop littered the area.  I started my stair-climbing routine, but I was slowed down by the sticky steps, coated with beer and cigarette butts.  Things had changed since the winter.  I don’t know why the Casino Ballroom management hadn’t hosed down the stairs.  This isn’t the best place for Jaxon and me; we’d better stick to a different kind of rock show.

The New Rock ShowWhen I got home, I texted Jaxon with my research findings.  We decided to skip the Billy Idol concert.  This summer we’ll walk the off-beat paths along the beach, free from spilled beer and large toe-crunching dancing girls.

No one is to blame.

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The Road Trip

Posted on May 20, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

In another life, I used to travel a lot more than I do today.  My job required me to “liaise” with customers and that meant I would travel and visit with them as often as they wanted to see me.  (Cough…liaise is a corporate word for traveling to visit with customers.)

My travels were always domestic; I’d frequently visit with customers in Pittsburgh and Charlotte, less frequently in Phoenix.  Once, I went to San Antonio and even a strange rural outpost in Arkansas.  I never had any customers in Chicago, but I ended up going there a few times, too.

I’ve never been to Disney World, though.

All this travel within the Ewe Ess of Aaaye makes me sound parochial, but I’m not.  There are a few places I’d like to go in this world to ink up my passport.  I’d like to go to Bavaria and see where my grandparents were born; I wouldn’t mind seeing a few of the architectural wonders of Europe, either.  It would be pleasant to move about a country without a McDonald’s on every corner.

Is there such a place?

I’m going on a car trip with some friends today, to almost Connecticut.  It should be just fine as long as we don’t get caught behind any student drivers.

Lee-Annie Leonie is our chauffer and she’s an excellent driver.

Posted in Experiments and Challenges | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

New Words for Happiness

Posted on May 19, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

In the month of May, new and sometimes fragrant words for happiness bloom everywhere.  Tulips, forsythia, lilacs, apple blossoms, and bleeding hearts are just a few.

Bleeding Hearts at Motel FourFind new words for happiness today.

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Fire in the Vinca Vines

Posted on May 17, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

Wikipedia, the internet oracle of knowledge, is confused by the term “Corporate America” and provides a disambiguation page.  Working inside of a corporation involves disambiguation, too.  I should know; I’ve worked at four “Big Corporations” in my life, two of which have been Fortune 500 companies.  I also worked at a slipper factory, a Howard Johnson’s, and a bridal salon.

I’m not bragging.

There was no disambiguation about Thursday’s weather; it was a glorious day to be outside.  There was a bluebird sky, the temperature hovered around 75 degrees, and there was no humidity.  The landscapers had been working furiously around the corporate real estate, replacing sunburnt sod and tired bark mulch.  The sprinklers were creating prisms of color and steam off the hot sidewalk.  It was a merry May day in New England.  Cherie Ripperton and I took our lunch walk and discussed dwarf flowering trees.  She wants to plant one in her home garden, but she’s worried that even a dwarf tree will grow too large for the space she’d like to fill.

We made our pedestrian loop and we headed back.  I had been hypothesizing that if a pear tree could be espaliered into controlled shapes, there must be a dwarf flowering tree that would be right for her garden.  As we approached the office and walked around the sprinkler, Cherie said “Do you see smoke?”

“It’s the sprinkler fog or you’re seeing things,” I said.

We took a few more steps.

Cherie said, “No, I think there’s smoke coming from that rhododendron bush.”

We got closer and sure enough, there was not only smoke coming from the ground near the rhododendron bush, there was a low fire burning between the Vinca vines.

Oh no.

I started stomping on the flames with my sneaker and Cherie ran into the building to get some help.  She came back and said “go and get the sprinkler,” so I ran and grabbed the sprinkler and doused the fire.

It wasn’t a big deal, really, and most of the people walking in and out of the building didn’t pay much attention to two women stomping on a flower bed and flailing a sprinkler back and forth.  The facilities manager came out and we discussed what could have caused the fire.  Maybe it was a cigarette thrown into the mulch or maybe it was spontaneous combustion.  Bark mulch is organic decomposing matter; there’s heat, gas, and oxygen involved and it does occasionally erupt into flames.

When we got back into the office, a few people asked us if we’d been “upta camp” because we smelled like smoke.  I reminded my co-workers that I had been a “fire marshal” at the Big Corporation up the road and I was no stranger to fire trucks.


Cherie suggested that maybe a bird had picked up a smoldering cigarette butt to make a nest and had accidentally dropped it in the mulch.  A cigarette butt would make a nice neck pillow for the birds.  The landscape manager showed up later in the afternoon to shut off the sprinklers and I ran out to tell him about the fire.  He smiled at the suggestion of cigarette smoking birds and said it was probably spontaneous combustion due to the dry weather.

Nothing is ever as it appears, but where there’s smoke, there’s fire.

Posted in Friday Pillow Talk | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

Apple Blossom Time

Posted on May 16, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

One day in May…

Apple Blossom Time…in my vintage avocado green bathroom.

Bei Mir Bist Du Schön.

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Call Aunt Toe-May-Toe

Posted on May 15, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

My brother’s got a new phone with a hands-free device for his car.  He’s got different phone numbers set up to dial according to his voice commands, like “call Miss Mary” or “call the Dairy Maid.”  According to my brother, the device has a tough time with “call Aunt Tomato” and it always questions him.

“Call for your aunt’s tee time?”

He gets a kick every time it happens and he’ll tell me how he has to correct the device by saying

“Call Aunt Toe-May-Toe.”

It’s a crazy first world problem.

Aunt Tomato made a whirlwind trip to Lisbon Falls on Tuesday night for a Moxie Festival meeting.  After I left the meeting, I drove around town to check out my gardens; spring was busting out all over.  Tulips were popping in the Redemption Garden and in the Surprise Garden.  Over at Uncle Bob’s, the 4 inch high pea plants were reaching towards the trellis and standing dangerously close to O’Pa’s rhubarb.  Uncle Bob will have something to say, no doubt.  My rain barrels were out and full (thank you, Uncle Bob) and my lettuce mix is two weeks away from early eating.

Scooting the Jeep behind the barn and avoiding a pea shoot out with Uncle Bob, I zipped over to my parent’s house for a bite to eat before I hit the long road back to The Coop.  I got caught up on the hometown news; my mother told me her farm share at Little Ridge Farm was starting this week.  Then my mother said “Uncle Bob asked if you were going to bring your tomatoes up this weekend.”

Someone is always asking about my tomato plants.

A few weeks ago, Reggie Black asked me if I’d ever heard of using dog kibble as a fertilizer for potted tomatoes and would I consider using it for my garden tomatoes.  He told me an amazing story of an Italian gardener who had grown lush and productive tomatoes by mixing Gravy Train dog food into the potting mix.

At least I think that’s what he said.

I had never heard of such a thing and I can only imagine what Uncle Bob would say if I brought a bag of dog food with me to plant my tomatoes.  We’ll see, Reggie.  All I know right now is that if Uncle Bob is asking about my tomato plants, that means he’s been monitoring the weather and he thinks it’s “go time.”  To say my tomato plants were ready for planting was an understatement.

Once again, I started my seedlings too early and I’ve got a table full of circus freak plants.

Sometimes, I wonder how I dare to call myself Aunt Tomato.  Of course, I could always just call myself Aunt Tee Time…

Posted in Dear Aunt Tomato, Home, Water | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Kings and Princes

Posted on May 14, 2013 by Julie-Ann Baumer

One of my church friends once gave me something she printed out for her family called “The 21 Rules of This House.” She had six children she was homeschooling. I like the rules and they hang near my kitchen sink where I study them while washing my dishes.

Today’s brief blog post covers rules 9 and 10:

9. When someone is sad, we comfort him,

10. When someone is happy, we rejoice with him.

Today is my father’s 80th birthday and I have certainly written a great many things about him in the past few weeks. I’ll probably write a great many things about him in the future. He has been a “king” in our family these four score years. God bless you, Dad.

Today would also be the birthday of a dear friend’s dad. He’s no longer here for my friend and maybe she’s sad today. I offer this small token of thoughtful comfort to her. Her dad was a prince of a guy and I miss him too.

For Kings and PrincesThis is for all the kings and princes today.

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